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I subscribed to a lifetime edition of American Christianity today. The headlines on the cover sounded promising. Unconditional Love, Service Roles- just sounds super inclusive and volunteer-oriented.

Oh shit, I think I may have fallen for false advertising again. I’m too gullible, the covers always get me but I’ve really got to start reading before I subscribe to this stuff.

My first and second editions came today, the one about unconditional love and the one about service roles? I was pumped and ready to read and the one about unconditional love sounded so incredible at first. It went on and on about how each person should be loved fully and beautifully, but then it got real confusing. Like it started talking about what it actually means which apparently is unconditional love unless LGBTQ+, or are pro-choice, or are a liberal, or are from anywhere at all other than America…there’s more but those are the main ones. I felt like maybe I was missing something and misunderstood so I read the second edition on Service Roles.

Yeah, I don’t think I missed anything. This one was specifically about how men can be leaders and head of the household and in leadership of all kinds and how women can’t be in any of those roles. Oh, and women also have to be pro-life and should submit to their husbands and should also at all times dress modestly but still wear makeup.

I thought it was over but there was a small addendum about something called “tithe”. Apparently they want you to give an extra 10 % of your income on top of tax to the state. Something about making sure the pastor is able to get the latest Apple product on time? I don’t know.

One thing I do know though? I’m unsubscribing. Should have known it was a capitalist move, it had ‘American’ in the title after all.